In this lecture series exploring the medieval worldview, historian Oleg Voskoboinikov delves into topics such as perspectives on love, family, the role of women in this male-dominated world, and a daily routine often disrupted by war. He investigates how the church viewed family, marriage, and sex. The lecture specifically explores why, even in the role of a queen, a woman was considered hostage to a man and whether there was room for romantic love in the Middle Ages. Find the answers to these questions in the second lecture of the course.
At the heart of any civilization lie the relationships between people. The most developed form of these ties is found in political formations, while the family represents the minimal unit, which is where we will begin our exploration.
marriage
The birth of a medieval child required the coming together of a man and a woman, and then either a family, one of the parents, foster parents, relatives, or a group of people to raise the child, and this aspect mirrors our world today. In traditional societies, the structure and daily life of the family found its explanation and foundation in religion.
Within Christian dogma, there exists a fascinating paradox. The Virgin Mary, a woman of flesh and blood, is considered sinless and gives birth to a son who is both God and a man. He is the son of the Heavenly Father, the creator of heaven and earth while also being the child of his earthly mother. He is born within time, yet as one of the persons of the trinity, he also exists eternally, begotten before the ages, prior to the world in which he and his mother live.
Mary's betrothed, the carpenter Joseph, plays a crucial role as the guardian of the holy family, supporting them through earthly hardships, including caring for them during the census and in their escape to Egypt to avoid Herod's wrath. However, he fades from the story of the gospel long before its culmination—the sacrifice on the cross, where the Heavenly Father determines the fate of his son and all humanity. Moreover, Mary, who holds a heavenly deity, becomes closely associated with the Church, which represents God on earth. In this role, Mary the mother is likened to the bride of Christ and even considered his daughter. This interwoven connection between Mary, the divine, and the Church highlights the complexity and significance of familial and spiritual relationships within the Christian worldview of the medieval era. Such paradoxes of faith were equally perplexing for medieval Christians and continue to challenge us today. The story of Adam and Eve illustrates a contradictory narrative: the creator blessed them to be fruitful and multiply, yet condemned them later for disobedience when Eve, instigated by the serpent, tasted the forbidden fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil and shared it with Adam. The Book of Genesis i
Jesus, while frequently visiting family homes and providing support to widows and children, also called upon his followers to be willing to forsake their parents and families for the sake of his name. Similarly, echoing Jesus, the apostle 1
In the Middle Ages, the status of the family, blood relations, and kinship ties were complex issues. In Roman society, a citizen was not only an individual but also a family man, bound by rights and responsibilities to his ancestors and descendants. The family was seen as the ‘seminarium civitatis’, the nursery of the state. However, for the influential thinker Augustine 2
During the Middle Ages, relations between individuals and groups were not based solely on blood ties but increasingly on spiritual kinship as well. The significance of godparenthood as a purely Christian phenomenon marked a profound restructuring of people's lives. In contrast with Europe today, where connections between godparents and godchildren are often seen as personal matters or family traditions, ten centuries ago, they held an unquestionable truth. It is worth noting that blood relatives were consistently excluded from participation in baptisms during the first millennium. The Church and society sought to replace blood ties with connections strengthened, so to speak, by water and spirit, emphasizing the importance of spiritual bonds along with family ties. This shift in perception influenced the fabric of medieval society, shaping the way people formed relationships and connections with each other.
All societies have various ways of integrating individuals into the social fabric, replacing the family with other concepts such as clans, client relations, or even pioneer camps. Additionally, compulsory primary education and military service have long been recognized as stages of interaction and, at times, sites of confrontation between individuals, families, society, and the state. However, in the medieval world, neither compulsory education nor military service existed. Nevertheless, individuals understood that relying solely on the family was not sustainable in the long-term. They recognized that family interests, which every family member was expected to defend, could inadvertently lead to destructive consequences for the family itself and the broader community. This realization necessitated the establishment of external relations and mechanisms to regulate family life. Spiritual ties, not necessarily based on blood but accepted as religious duties and rules of conduct, became one such lever.
woman
In the context of medieval society, women played a crucial role as the guardians of the family. One can easily imagine their challenging existence over generations, involving a continuous cycle of conceiving, giving birth, swaddling, and caring for children. At the time, infant mortality rates were alarmingly high, with a significant percentage of infants not surviving beyond their first days or months and many not reaching the age of nine. To ensure the survival of at least a few children, it was not uncommon for women to give birth to a considerable number, sometimes around twelve or more. Wealthier and more educated women could delegate some responsibilities to maids and helpers, but they still bore the burdens of pregnancy, childbirth, and domestic duties. Moreover, women also carried the weight of societal notions stemming from the story of Eve, who, according to religious beliefs, was the cause of original sin by taking the forbidden apple. This perception placed an inherited responsibility on women as they were viewed as the heirs of Eve's supposed transgression. Thus, for centuries, the voices of women were stifled, leaving them with little to no opportunity for expression.
In the face of such challenges, the resilience and fortitude of women in medieval society were remarkable. They faced immense hardships and societal expectations while quietly carrying the burdens of family and home, often without a voice or recognition. The silence that persisted for a thousand years does not diminish the strength and significance of their contributions to the fabric of medieval life.
All of this is true, and medieval society as a whole is undoubtedly male dominated, with women having no separate rank from men in their ‘table of ranks’. A widowed queen faced the very real threat of losing both her position and property. However, through the entire millennium, one can also encounter remarkable women—powerful and influential, talented and enterprising, married and widowed, eloquent, and even militant (and we are not talking only about Joan of Arc) 4
Perhaps ‘world’ is the key word when we talk about this ‘cell of society’. It is not difficult to deduce that a woman here becomes a victim of this very ‘world’ that is needed by men once again. She is merely granted the role of a trophy, a talisman, a pledge, or even a hostage. At first glance, there seems to be no place for personality, love, will, or happiness here. The family seems to be a derivative of significant, small, even microscopic politics. The ‘handing over’ of a bride was carefully arranged and accompanied by a publicly witnessed presentation of dowry. The celebration, the quantity and quality of gifts, the number and status of guests—all these circumstances held legal force and carried political and economic consequences depending on the status of the families uniting. It was not just the bride who moved from her place; various things, people, and even cities and countries were set in motion.
In the politically charged urban environment of medieval Italy, marriage could lead to a change or even the creation of a political party. For example, the White Guelphs (a Florentine faction to which Dante belonged) united in 1300, leaving behind their former quarrels, after a marriage between the Cerchi and Adimari families. On the other hand, an offense against a bride or their spouse could prove costly for the offender and their entire kin, triggering a long-lasting ‘feud’ i
One might have expected progress in the legal status of women in the last centuries of our era as the emancipation of women in Western Europe and relative equality in the family should have matured amid the depths of medieval barbarism. However, disappointingly, no such progress occurred, neither economically nor legally. Inheritances were sometimes passed down the female line, and at times, they were so substantial that world wars could be fought over them, as seen in the fourteenth century. For instance, King Edward III of England claimed the French throne as the maternal grandson of the French king after the termination of the Capetian dynasty 5
In the early Middle Ages, there were doubts about a woman's soul, which can be considered a curiosity today. However, men had no doubts about the perceived relative weakness of a woman's mind, often associating her with irrepressible sensuality. These prejudices are partly reflected in the true story of the last court duel of the Middle Ages as recounted by Froissart in his chronicles and depicted in Ridley Scott's recent movie, though the Russian title translation as The Last Duel does not accurately capture its nature.
This was not a conventional duel, but a legal duel in which a man, a warrior, staked his life for his honor. It was believed that God would intervene and grant victory to the one who was in the right. In the MeToo 7
Can one imagine a family created by love in the Middle Ages? Or at least based on the mutual desire of the young individuals, rather than being influenced by powerful clans behind them?
Did a marriage for love exist?
History indicates that from the eleventh century onwards, the church actively promoted publicly expressed consent as a requirement for marriage. As a result, secular wedding ceremonies started to resemble church ceremonies more closely, including the increasing involvement of priests. At the front of the church, at the portal or in its narthex i
The famous Arnolfini Portrait by Van Eyck, dated 1434, is not only the first family portrait in history but also perhaps the earliest pictorial evidence of marriage. The painting portrays a devout family scene within a cozy setting, incorporating elements such as a pet dog, discarded shoes, rosaries, a chandelier, a mirror reflecting the onlookers, a bed, and the pregnant belly of the wife, possibly suggesting anticipation of her forthcoming fertility. Additionally, the lemon on the windowsill symbolizes victory over the sin of Eve, who was believed to have taken the sour fruit from the tree of knowledge. However, there is no hint of any strong religious influence in these domestic scenes.
The institution of the family is for the laity. This is especially evident in the Catholic West, where celibacy has been the chosen path of the priesthood since the eleventh century. The Church views marriage and any sexual relationships, even attraction, as grave sins incompatible with administering the sacraments.
Even among the laity entering into marriage, sexual attraction, especially mutual attraction, has only taken on its ordinary meaning relatively recently. Evidence of interfamilial love, devotion, mutual support, respect, and love for children and grandchildren can be found in medieval texts. However, the mutual affection and passion of young people who have just met each other do not seem to be enough.
In the Song of the Nibelungs, Siegfried dreams of the beautiful Kriemhild, whom he has not yet seen in person. However, Kriemhild, observing him from afar, is captivated by his beauty and prowess. Eventually, the young couple meets and falls in love, but that is just the beginning of their story. Siegfried performs various favors for Gunther, Kriemhild's brother, and only after that does Gunther ask Kriemhild to marry Siegfried, fulfilling the promise he made to him. Kriemhild dutifully agrees to honor her brother's wishes. While scripture, fiction, and church sermons all speak of love as the foundation of the family, medieval society did not emphasize the necessity of documenting marriages based on love. Love, in a sense, was expected to develop within the confines of marriage. It was a matter of patience, where couples were encouraged to be patient and eventually fall in love.
Medieval family life was influenced by codification, ritualization, and the subjugation of instinct to community norms. Priestly guidance, the church calendar, and even medical advice played significant roles in shaping family practices. Medical treatises contained prescriptions regarding the frequency of intercourse to protect fragile male health. The clergy, seen as asexual and disinterested in sexual matters, exhorted people to behave appropriately, accounting for Christian holidays and fasts when intercourse was forbidden. The approved postures were strictly limited to those with women in a subordinate position to men. Contact during lactation, pregnancy, and menstruation was also condemned by both the clergy and medical practitioners. Termination of pregnancy and contraception were rare and not widely accepted in medieval society. The complex interplay of religious beliefs, cultural norms, and medical knowledge influenced the dynamics of family life during this time.
In medieval marriages, both spouses shared a strong desire for order and stability. While we previously discussed the importance of peace and honor, the concept of power held equal significance within the family. The notion that man was created first contributed to the belief in his higher status in comparison to a woman. Adam, as the original progenitor, was seen as primeval, which naturally led to the assumption of the husband's authority over his wife. Women were often perceived as weaker in various aspects, including physical strength and intelligence, with their moral frailty being attributed to sensuality prevailing over reason. As a result, their autonomy was limited, which was supposedly for their own benefit.
Women's daily lives were confined to a few spaces, such as specific rooms like the kitchen, the marketplace, the church, and the well.
In contrast, men were considered external beings, responsible for providing food, wealth, and social connections from the outside. The day-to-day management of these resources fell to the women. Urban literature of the time emphasized the role of a good wife, who knew how to skillfully handle these tasks and find utility in the products primarily produced by men's labor.