Sei Shonagon's

Life Rules

~ 5 min read
Sei Shonagon's

Kobayashi Kiyochika. Sei Shonagon, from the series "Ancient Patterns". 1896. Japan. Color wood engraving/Alamy

At the turn of the eleventh century, the writer known as Sei Shonagon, a lady-in-waiting to Empress Teishi (or Sadako), wrote her famous Pillow Book —a work that would secure her place among Japan’s most celebrated writers. Although the chambers of imperial wives and concubines were always places for the best female poets, writers, artists, and intellectuals to gather, Sei Shonagon still shone like an infinitely bright star amidst this brilliant galaxy. Her wit, keen observations, and virtuoso painting skills brought her great fame during her lifetime and continued to captivate audiences long after her death. And as Japan began to open up to the outside world, the works of this medieval Japanese writer received global recognition, despite the fact that she left behind no serious historical works or great novels—only these ironic, dreamy, sometimes snarky, and sometimes sad lines from her personal diary.

On Handsome Men

Gentlemen should always have escorts. Even young noblemen, however handsome and charming, strike me as dull creatures if they are unescorted.

On the Education of Girls

When I make myself imagine what it is like to be one of those women who live at home, faithfully serving their husbands women who have not a single exciting prospect in life yet who believe that they are perfectly happy, I am filled with scorn. […] I wish they could live for a while in our society even if it should mean taking service as Attendants, so that they might come to know the delights it has to offer.

On Ill-Wishers

You were not too well disposed towards someone, and now he, in retaliation, makes up stories, slanders you, denigrates you as best he can, and extols himself to the heavens! How disgusting!

Sei Shonagon, from the illustrated book "Collection of Pictures of Beauties" by Hishikawa Moronobu/Alamy

Sei Shonagon, from the illustrated book "Collection of Pictures of Beauties" by Hishikawa Moronobu/Alamy

On Letters from the Provinces

A letter arrives from the provinces, but no gift accompanies it. It would be bad enough if such a letter reached one in the provinces from someone in the capital; but then at least it would have interesting news about goings-on in society, and that would be a consolation.

On Fleas

Fleas, too, are very hateful. When they dance about under someone's clothes, they really seem to be lifting them up.

On Children

One has allowed oneself to speak badly about someone without really intending to do so; a young child who has overheard it all goes and repeats what one has said in front of the person in question.

On Hateful Things

A man who has nothing in particular to recommend him discusses all sorts of subjects at random as though he knew everything.

On Eating on Dates

I cannot bear men to eat when they come to visit ladies-in-waiting in the palace. I also object to women who offer food to their male guests. […] For my part, even if a man arrived very late and very drunk, I should never offer him so much as a bowl of watered rice. If he thinks I am heartless and decides not to visit again—well, then let him stay away!

On Hateful People

Sometimes, one is in the middle of a story when someone butts in and tries to show that he is the only clever person in the room. Such a person is hateful, and so, indeed, is anyone, child or adult,

On What Brings Joy

One languishes in boredom, but suddenly a guest comes, somebody one is not normally too close with. He brings the latest court news, talks about various events, funny, sad, or strange, about this and that . . . He is aware of everything, in both public and private affairs, he speaks about everything sensibly and clearly. That brings joy to one’s heart.

On Enemies

Somebody one hates enters the room, and one’s soul freezes. The heart is a strange thing, so easy to disturb.

On Foolish Parents

Embarrassing things. Parents, convinced that their ugly child is adorable, pet him and repeat the things he has said, imitating his voice.

On Hateful Things

I cannot stand people who leave without closing the panel behind them.

Sei Shonagon viewing the snow / Alamy

Sei Shonagon viewing the snow / Alamy

On the Beauty of Plump People

Small children and babies ought to be plump. So ought provincial governors and others who have gone ahead in the world; for, if they are lean and desiccated, one suspects them of being ill-tempered.

On Gossip

To have spoken about someone not knowing that he could overhear. This is embarrassing even if it is a servant or some other completely insignificant person.

On Surprising and Distressing Things

A child or grown-up blurts out something that is bound to make people uncomfortable.

On Tact

Presumptuous things. […] One is about to say something to a person who is obviously embarrassed, but then he speaks first—very strange.

On the Home of a Woman Living Alone

When a woman lives alone, her house should be extremely dilapidated, the mud wall should be falling to pieces, and if there is a pond, it should be overgrown with water plants. It is not essential that the garden be covered with sage brush; but weeds should be growing through the sand in patches, for this gives the place a poignantly desolate look.

I greatly dislike a woman's house when it is clear that she has scurried about with a knowing look on her face, arranging everything just as it should be, and when the gate is kept tightly shut.

On Prayer

When I go to a temple for a retreat in the First Month, I like the weather to be extremely cold; there should be snow on the ground, and everything should be frozen. If it looks like rain, however, I feel most dissatisfied.

On Compassion

When someone sobs out a pathetic story, one is deeply moved, but it so happens that not a single tear comes to one's eyes—it is most awkward. Though one makes one's face look as if one is going to cry, it is no use: not a single tear will come. Yet there are times when, having heard something happy, one feels the tears streaming out.

On Her Diary

I never thought that these notes would be read by anyone else, and so I included everything that came into my head, however strange or unpleasant.

What to read

The Pillow Book by Sei Shonagon (Translated by V. Markova), Tolk, 1995.

The Pillow Book by Sei Shonagon (Translated and edited by Ivan Morris), Columbia University Press, 1967

Japan in the Heian era (794-1185): Chrestomathy. Ed. I.S. Smirnov; Comp. M.V. Grachev. Russian State University for the Humanities, 2009.